No Reservations

Yes, that is title of the movie I saw today… The storyline was actually good, but the movie was as flat as a glass of stale beer, no self respecting aria of Madam Butterfly or Traviata could save the deflated soufflé, nor the quail with champagne and wild mushroom sauce worth its truffle… Chef Kate’s paced through her dull New York apartment more like a fashion model than an over-zealous chef.

During my humble career in Food and Hospitality I met a few chefs. Most were man… For instance, tres-elegant French executive-chef Robert (pronounced Robear) was of the species capable to compete as IRON CHEF... Fast, meticulous, precise, austere, proud... he personally would fly a thousand miles to obtain the perfect Filet de Boeuf and could make a Pompadour-Homard (lobster) worthy of the Prince of Wales.

Yes I knew Italian-Swiss chef Marco, the meanest guy whose career almost ended when doctors amputated his right leg as a result of neglected diabetes… But he did not care… He just loved food… food and wine… Could I forget Zhiggy, the mad banquet-chef? I still can hear his German-accented shout: “Line up… Pick up… Pick up… If you drop it I’ll chop your head…“ Chef Zhiggy adored Wagner, cigarettes and Heineken; he went to the ladies’ bathroom to have a smoke, and never washed his hands…

I have known 3 lady-chefs. Religious Portuguese Maria made the sign of the cross over each Bouillabaisse. Encarna was Spanish-Lebanese, off duty she liked Flamenco and Middle Eastern foods, boiled chicken, lentil soup, Molochia, a green weed picked along the Nile, halva, cognac and champagne. When she became grandmother she packed it all in and went to Paris…

In a five star hotel worked the third lady, French-Canadian executive chef, lesbian, with an unusual name and a rare sense of humour, thoughts of her remind of Queen Latifah in the movie “Chicago;” at Xmastime she gave gifts of huge chocolate Santas, and while cooks, chefs and gifted kitchen-employees made gingerbread houses, hers were palaces; in Singapore she learned Ice-Sculpture well enough to win awards, she explained that a woman in a man’s world has to work three times as hard only to be twice as good… But... I stray... the receipe failed for NO RESERVATIONS?